From Me To You
by obsessedwithstabler
Summary: As the coffin was lowered into the cold ground, Alex Eames felt as though her heart had been ripped out of her chest and stomped into a bloody pulp on the ground in front of her. Her eyes watered again, and she scrubbed at her eyes.
1. A Cold And Lonely Day

Okay, I know this chapter is short (and that I have ADD when it comes to these stories, but ya'll knew that) but it's just a beginning. A prologue, of sorts. So enjoy, and don't forget to review, bunnies/duckies/woodland creatures! Ah, and I don't own the Diamond Rio song, One More Day. Dang it...

Disclaimer: They ain't mine... heh...

This chapter is for Kelly, for listening to all my caffinated rantings about conspiracies and broken bones. (looks around nervously, then hides under kitchen sink)

As the coffin was lowered into the cold ground, Alex Eames felt as though her heart had been ripped out of her chest and stomped into a bloody pulp on the ground in front of her. Her eyes watered again, and she scrubbed at her eyes, her pride refusing to let the tears fall.

In her hand she gripped a single red rose, and once the coffin had been lowered into the ground, she dropped it into the hole, the hole that now represented her life. Thunder rumbled lowly in the distance, and the sky suddenly opened its floodgates, soaking her instantly. She heard someone call her name, but she couldn't bring herself to tear her eyes away from the coffin in front of her.

"Alex," Mike called softly, gently gripping her shoulder. "Come on, honey. Let me take you home. You don't need to get sick on top of this."

She reluctantly allowed herself to be led away from the grave, all the while thinking, _Why him? Why Bobby?_

_One more day _

_One more time _

_One more sunset, baby _

_I'd be satisfied _

_But then again _

_I know what it would do _

_Leave me wishing still _

_For one more day with you_

TBC...

A/N: (ducks flaming shoes and pans while diving for cover under rock) Eek! Review, and I'll post the second chapter tonight, bunnies! Go, go!


	2. You're Gonna Be

Wow, people were mad about the last chapter... Well, I hope this one makes everyone feel better...

Disclaimer: They ain't mine, and that makes me sad...

This chapter is all for Kelly and Blu, for all their advice, ideas, and not throwing me into the padded room. (looks around nervously, then hides in linen closet)

The next day, Alex was sitting on her couch in her apartment, a thick blanket wrapped around her shoulders and home movies playing on the T.V. A knock at the door startled her out of her memories, and she slowly rose from her seat and shuffled to the door, opening it warily.

"Yes? Can I help you?" she asked the man who was standing in front of her. He was dressed in an expensive looking gray suit, his hair was slicked back against his head, and he had a suitcase in one hand.

"Are you Alexandra Eames?" he questioned, and she gave him a little nod. "My name's Jake Smith, and I'm an attorney." She shot him a questioning glance. "Let me explain. I'm Robert Goren's attorney, and I'm here to talk to you about his will." She silently allowed him access to her apartment, shutting the door behind him. He quickly set his briefcase down on the table and sat in one of the chairs, and she sat across from him and watched as he opened the suitcase, producing several papers and envelopes.

"I'll get straight to the point, Miss Eames," he stated crisply. "As you probably know, Mr. Goren was a fairly affluent man. And in his will, he dictated that, in the event of his death, all of his assets, his home, his stocks and bonds, and his bank account go to you." Her eyes widened, and he nodded as he continued. "All in all, he left you just over a million dollars." She leaned back in her chair and ran her hand over her face. _Bobby, what were you thinking?_ she thought. "But there is one more thing," he added, and she looked up at him. "Miss Eames, you know that Mr. Goren had no living relatives?" She nodded. "Were you also aware that he had a child?"

She nearly fell out of her seat at his question, and she stuttered, "What? Bobby never… he didn't… Bobby had a child?" The attorney looked stunned, and he reached into the briefcase and retrieved an eight by ten picture, then handed it to Alex. "That's Justin Robert Goren. He's a month old, and Bobby had gained sole custody after the mother disappeared."

"Why are you telling me this?" she whispered as she stared at the picture of the bright eyed infant.

"Because Bobby also specified in his will that if something were to happen to him, he wanted you to take custody of the baby."

She tried to speak, but all she could manage was a small squeak.

"He trusted you over anyone else in this world, Miss Eames. That's why he chose you. But if you cannot, or will not take responsibility for the child, he will be placed for adoption," he stated gravely.

As soon as the words passed his lips, Alex knew that that simply wasn't an option. There was no way that she was going to abandon Bobby's son with strangers, not when she wanted him. "Where is he?" she asked, and a smile appeared on Jake's face as he passed her a slip of paper.

"That's the address where you can pick him up. Come in at nine a.m. with this letter, and he's all yours." She nodded, and he said goodbye and walked out of the apartment, leaving Alex clutching the picture.

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"Let me get this straight," Deakins said slowly as he eyed Alex. "Bobby's attorney came to you and told you that Bobby had a son." She nodded her affirmation. "And Bobby left you a million dollars and his son?" She nodded again, and he rubbed his temples as he sank down into his chair. "Alex, do you understand what you're getting yourself into?"

"I think I have an idea," she bit out, and he sighed.

"I'm sorry. I know you know. You really want to take this baby?"

"Of course I do! This isn't some crazy project I just decided to do to cure a midlife crisis. This is Bobby's child we're talking about, and I'm not going to let him disappear. Bobby trusted me enough for me to take him, and I'm not going to let him down."

The ferociousness in her voice and delicate features made him smile, and he nodded thoughtfully. "All right. Is there any way that we can help"  
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Alex stomach rolled as she walked through the Children's Services door. What if something went wrong? What if they wouldn't let her take Justin? Thos thoughts, along with a million others, raced through her mind as she approached a friendly looking woman sitting behind her desk.

"Can I help you?" the woman asked, and Alex nodded and handed her the letter and her I.D.

"I'm here for Justin Goren," she stated, and the woman smiled brightly at her and rose to her feet.

"Ah, yes. We've been waiting for you, Miss Eames. Just follow me," she said, and she led Alex down a long hallway. Finally she came to a stop, and she opened the door and walked in, with Alex right behind her. Alex watched as she walked over to a bright blue crib and carefully lifted Justin into her arms, bouncing him gently, and she felt her heart lift when she laid the infant in her arms.

She gently touched his cheek, and her breath caught in her throat as she stared down into the familiar chocolate brown eyes. "I can really take him?" she whispered, and the other woman chuckled warmly.

"Just sign some forms, and he's all yours," she confirmed, and Alex felt a tear slide down her cheek.

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On the way home, Alex kept glancing into her review mirror at Justin, who was sleeping soundly in his carseat. Finally she pulled into her driveway, smiling when she recognized several cars parked at the curb. She turned the engine off and climbed out of her seat, then opened the backseat car door and lifted Justin into her arms.

"Come on, baby boy," she murmured, carefully cradling him against her chest as she walked up the steps and opened the front door. As she flipped the light switch, everyone appeared from their hiding places and whispered loudly, "Surprise!" She laughed and shut the door, and Carolyn and her mother immediately pounced on her.

"He's so beautiful," Carolyn cooed, and Alex smiled and moved to sit on the couch, and Carolyn and Helen both joined her.

"I'd like all of you to meet Justin Robert Goren," Alex announced quietly, and the group smiled and murmured approvingly. "Can you guys believe this?"

Mike knelt down in front of her and gently ran his thumb along the baby's forehead, smiling when he reached out and wrapped one tiny fist around Mike's long finger. Alex smiled and tucked her legs under herself, then turned to her dad and said, "Is it ready?"

He grinned proudly and said, "Yep. We got the walls painted and everything else done, and the crib is set up too."

"And I brought you all of Eric's baby clothes and toys and made up a few bottles of formula and put them in the fridge," her sister added, and Alex smiled and looked down at the infant cradled in her arms.

"Do you… Do you guys think that Bobby would be upset if I wanted to call this little guy Bobby?" she asked softly, and everyone exchanged sad glances.

Helen moved to wrap her arm around her daughter's shoulder and hold her, whispering, "Alex, baby, Bobby wouldn't mind at all. He'd just be so proud that his son is with someone who loves him so much." At her mother's words, Alex felt the tears fall down her cheeks, and this time she didn't stop them.

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"Bobby!" Alex cried out as she bolted upright in her bed, and she shivered as she tried to slow her racing heart. Through the baby monitor, she heard Bobby crying, and she quickly threw her blankets off of her and padded into the nursery.

"Hey, hey, hey," she murmured, lifting Bobby into her arms. "What's wrong? What is it, baby boy?" He snuffled, and she carefully sat in the rocking chair beside the window, leaning back and slowly rocking back and forth. He continued to cry, and she whispered, "Would you like me to sing to you? Your daddy always loved it when I sang to him." He looked up at her, and she cleared her throat and began to sing softly.

_Six pounds and nine ounces, looking up at me _

_Like I have all the answers, I hope I have the ones you need _

_I've never really done this _

_Now I know what scared is_

_Sometimes I'll protect you from everything that's wrong _

_Other times I'll let you just find out on your own _

_But that's when you'll be growing _

_And the whole time I'll be knowing_

_You're gonna fly with every dream you chase _

_You're gonna cry, but know that that's okay _

_Sometimes life's not fair _

_But if you hang in there _

_You're gonna see that sometimes bad is good _

_We just have to believe things work out like they should _

_Life has no guarantees, but always loved by me _

_You're gonna be_

_I'm afraid you'll have to suffer _

_Through some of my mistakes _

_Lord knows I'll be trying _

_To give you what it takes _

_What it takes to know the difference in getting by and living _

_Cause anything worth doing is worth doing all the way _

_Just know you'll have to live with _

_All the choices that you make _

_So make sure you're always giving _

_Way more than you're taking_

_You're gonna fly with every dream you chase _

_You're gonna cry, but know that that's okay _

_Sometimes life's not fair _

_But if you just hang in there _

_You're gonna see that sometimes bad is good _

_We just have to believe things work out like they should _

_Life has no guarantees, but always loved by me _

_You're gonna be_

_Someone's everything, you're gonna see _

_Just what you are to me_

_You're gonna fly with every dream you chase _

_We just have to believe things work out like they should _

_Life has no guarantees, but always loved by me _

_You're gonna be _

_Always loved by me_

When she finished, she looked down at him and realized that he had fallen asleep. Chuckling softly, she kissed his forehead, rose to her feet and carefully laid him in his crib, then watched him sleep peacefully for a few minutes.

As she watched his tiny chest rise and fall, her mind absorbed what had happened over the last two days. Yesterday, she had buried her best friend, her partner, her lover. And today, she had become the mother of the most beautiful baby boy in the world.

It was almost as though God had taken Bobby away from her, then gave her his son to mend her broken heart. Her heart still ached from the loss of the one man that meant more to her than any man ever would, but was this tiny child capable of healing that hurt?

She gently trailed her fingertips along his tiny back, and she felt happiness bubble up in her chest, an emotion she thought she could never feel again.

_I may not ever be able to hold Bobby again, _she thought sadly as she watched her son sleep. _But at least I have you, baby boy. And I'm never going to lose you. Never._

With that thought, she kissed her son's head, then slipped back out of the nursery and into her own room, climbing slowly into her bed and pulling the quilt up to her chin. The picture frame beside her bed caught her eye, and she picked it up reverently, running her fingertips along Bobby's smiling face. With a soft sigh, she held the picture to her chest and rolled over onto her side, closing her eyes and willing sleep to come.

TBC..

A/N: Hahaha, yes! There is soooo much more to come! Oh, and that song was You're Gonna Be, by Reba McEntire. Now, go review, my bunnies! Review!


	3. My Son

Okay, at the overwhelming requests (and threats) of my lovely reviews, here's chapter three of From Me To You. Enjoy, and please remember to review! Oh, and everyone wants to know why I decided to have Alex call Justin by his middle name. That actually came to me from my dad's ex wife, who has five kids and calls two of them by their middle names, Dalton Cole and Daniel Brock (Cole and Brock) Make sense now? Okay, on with the story!

Disclaimer: They ain't mine. What else is there to say?

This chapter is for Blu, Rach, Essy, and everyone else who reviewed. Thanks very much!

"Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday, dear Bobby! Happy birthday to you!" the group sang, and Alex leaned down to kiss the top of her son's curly, dark head. He reached out one chubby hand and grabbed a fistful of the cake, then shoved it into his mouth.

Mike, who was filming everything, zoomed in on the laughing and cake covered baby, and he grinned. "This will make a great video to show at his eighteenth birthday party," he laughed, and Alex smiled and shook her head.

Nearly a year had passed since her partner's death, but each day seemed to get a little easier with her son. On her darkest days, he could lift her spirit with a bright, toothless grin and a bubbly laugh. The worst days were always the firsts. The first Christmas and Thanksgiving without Bobby. Her first birthday without him. His birthday. That had been the worst, when she had woken up and realized that this year, there would be no going out to a bar to celebrate with Mike and Carolyn. No coming into work the next day with the hangover from hell. There would be just her going down to his gravesite and spending several hours just talking. At times, it was so hard that she felt like she couldn't breathe. Then she'd look at her son, Bobby's son, and it didn't seem so bad. He was her reason for getting up every morning, for not ending it all. He was her light, her everything.

"Hey, Alex," Carolyn called, and Alex looked at her. "You spaced out there for a minute. You okay?"

She smiled at her friend's concern. "Yeah. I'm okay."

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That night, Alex carried Bobby into the nursery and laid him in his crib, her heart warming when he looked up at her with those big brown eyes and smiled. "God, you look so much like your daddy," she murmured, running one gentle hand over his thick brown curls.

She sighed softly. _Bobby, you're missing so much,_ she thought sadly. _He took his first steps not too long ago, and he came to me. But Mike swears up and down it's because I had a cookie in my hand._ A tear spilled from her eyelashes, and Bobby's little face suddenly became thoughtful, reminding her so much of another man close to her heart.

"Ma ma," he cooed, reaching his arms up for Alex. She smiled and wiped the tear away, then bent over and kissed his forehead, inhaling his sweet baby scent.

"My Bobby," she whispered as she pulled away and continued to watch him. "My baby boy," she smiled. "I used to sing this song to your daddy all the time." He looked up at her and continued to smile, and she closed her eyes and began their nightly ritual of a bedtime song.

_I can't imagine any greater fear _

_Then waking up without you here _

_And though the sun would still shine on _

_My whole world would all be gone _

_But not for long If I had to run _

_If I had to crawl _

_If I had to swim a hundred rivers _

_Just to climb a thousand walls _

_Always know that I would find a way _

_To get to where you are _

_There's no place that far _

_It wouldn't matter why we're apart _

_Lonely miles or two stubborn hearts _

_Nothing short of God above _

_Could turn me away from your love _

_I need you that much _

_If I had to run _

_If I had to crawl _

_If I had to swim a hundred rivers _

_Just to climb a thousand walls _

_Always know that I would find a way _

_To get to where you are _

_There's no place that far_

_If I had to run _

_If I had to crawl _

_If I had to swim a hundred rivers _

_Just to climb a thousand walls _

_Always know that I would find a way _

_To get to where you are _

_There's no place that far _

_Baby there's no place that far_

Once she finished, she leaned down and kissed her sleeping son's forehead, running her thumb along his cheek.

"Happy birthday, sweetheart," she murmured before slipping out of the nursery.

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"Hey," Alex greeted Mike and Carolyn brightly, setting her purse and jacket in her chair. The two partners exchanged worried looks, and Alex's brows furrowed as she said, "What? What's wrong?"

Mike opened his mouth, but before he could utter a sound, Deakins appeared from his office, a serious look on his face. "Detective Eames, my office, please." The tone of his voice told her something was very wrong, and she apprehensively followed him into his office.

Mike and Carolyn looked at each other nervously before returning to their desks.

Once in the office, Alex saw a tall, brunette woman with a briefcase in her hand.

"Detective Eames, this is Natalie Coleman. She's a lawyer, and she needs to talk to you-"

Coleman held her hand up to silence Deakins, then she looked at Alex and handed her a manila envelope. "I'm here on behalf of my client. This is a court order and the D.N.A. results of a paternity test."

"Wait, D.N.A.? Paternity test? What are you talking about?" Alex demanded as she reached into the envelope and removed its contents.

"Justin Goren's mother is suing for custodial rights," Coleman stated coolly, and Alex nearly choked on the air in her throat.

"What?" she whispered. "I'm his mother."

"No, his birth mother never gave up her custodial rights. So you had no legal standing to adopt him."

Both Deakin's and Alex's jaws dropped, and Alex snarled, "Who the hell is this woman? She abandoned Bobby when he was born, and now she wants him back? There is no way in hell she's going anywhere near _my_ son!"

The lawyer retained her cool and calm demeanor. "It doesn't matter. My client's rights are valid."

"Who the hell is this woman, anyways?" Deakins demanded, and the lawyer faltered a little.

"Miss Elizabeth Hitchens," she finally answered, and Alex felt her world disappear from under her feet.

"Get out of here," Deakins growled at the lawyer, who had the sense to look frightened. "Don't even think about coming back and threatening my detective and her child without a court order." The lawyer huffed, then stormed out of the office, and Deakins immediately went around his desk and gathered Alex in his arms.

"It's okay, Alex," he murmured, and she shuddered and cried into his shoulder. "They're not going to take your son away. There is no way that that psycho is Bobby's mother. Don't even worry about it."

"I can't lose him, Jimmy," she whispered, swaying in Deakin's paternal embrace. Suddenly she pulled away, and Deakins could see a fire in her eyes, one that he thought Bobby's death had extinguished. "I lost my partner, and as God as my witness, I'm not losing my son."

Before he could reply, she stormed out of his office, leaving him worried. Turning around, he grabbed his phone and began dialing a familiar number. "Hey, it's me. Look, I've got a problem, and I really need your help. How soon can you get down here?"

TBC...

A/N: (ducks flaming shoes and pans while diving for cover) Bet ya'll didn't see that coming, didya?? MWHAHAHAHA!!


	4. His Little Spitfire

Wow, ya'll really like this story, huh? I'm very glad! (big cheesy grin) Well, it seems that this story has taken on a mind of it's own, and I'm just along for the ride... Enjoy, and please don't forget to review, bunnies!

Disclaimer: They ain't mine... Like I haven't tried.

This chapter is for everyone who's reviewed so far: **JusticeIsBlind13, Elphie Fae, InfinityStar, Canmar, Secret Phoenix 679, DCChild, g2fan, lallyb1743, Bambi McBimbo, Aus Scully, illcoveru42, kateBA, MARY T, rainy angellz, GraciePie, Norla, Lactuca, and cheersbabe16. **Extra big thanks go to** Confused, Rach, Kelly and Blue **for all their wonderful help, advice and harassment! LOL. I love ya'll!

Mike and Carolyn exchanged rueful glances as the haughty blond sashayed into the interrogation room, and Carolyn shot her an evil glare. "Right there, Ms. Wallace," Mike said politely, motioning to the chair at the table.

She smiled at Mike, making Carolyn ball her hands into fists at her sides. Instead of hitting the other woman, she moved to stand beside her partner.

"Please, Detective Logan, after all we've been through, it's Elizabeth," she purred, and Carolyn rolled her eyes. "And I really had hoped to talk to Detective Eames. Where is she?"

Mike shook his head and said, "Sorry, _Miss Wallace_, but it's just you and us. Detective Eames is preoccupied for the time being."

Alex watched from behind the observation glass as Wallace leaned back in her chair and ran her hand through her hair, smiling flirtatiously at Mike. Her knuckles went white as she gripped the wall, her teeth grinding noisily.

Somewhere in the back of her mind, a familiar voice spoke softly to her. _Calm down, Alex. Just take a deep breath and think_.

She obeyed the voice and closed her eyes, taking a cleansing breath and resting her head against the cool bricks. "Okay, Bobby. What are you trying to tell me?" she whispered. "What am I missing?"

_Watch her arm, Alex._

Then, just as suddenly as it had come, his voice was gone, leaving her cold and lonely again. But she shoved those feelings down and reminded herself that this wasn't about her. It was about her son, their son, that she had to get back. She wasn't about to give him up to anybody, especially to a murdering psychopath like Nicole Wallace.

"That's a shame, Detective Logan. I had really hoped to have a nice little reunion with my two favorite detectives." She sighed in disappointment, then crossed her legs and leaned in towards Mike. "I guess I'll just have to settle for you two."

"Guess so," Mike said with a shrug of his shoulder. He could sense Carolyn's tension, and he discreetly reached under the table and gently squeezed her knee, all the while staring at Wallace intently.

The contact did not go unnoticed by Wallace, and she knew an opportunity when she saw one. Taking into account their matching rings that they wore on their right hands, she began to formulate a plan. Keeping her eye contact with Mike, she removed her jacket, then leaned forward, exposing a large amount of cleavage.

"You seem like a… well endowed detective, Mike," she purred, laying her hand on top of his. He snatched his hand away and glared at her, but she just licked her glossy lips and smiled at him.

A loud knock on the window had Mike mumbling under his breath, and he reluctantly stood up and walked to the door.

"Leaving so soon, Mike?" Wallace asked, and he glared at her again and slammed the door behind himself. Once he was gone, Carolyn turned to a disappointed looking Wallace, saying, "Looks like it's just us girls now, Nicole."

An evil smile slowly curled her lips, and something told Carolyn that she had another trick up her sleeve.

Alex turned to Mike as he walked out of the interrogation room, and she asked, "Mike, did you notice anything different about her?"

"Other than she's gotten more stupid, or another set of brass ones?" he retorted sarcastically.

"I can't tell you why, but we need to find a way to look at her right arm," Alex stated, and Mike's dark eyebrows arched. "Just trust me on this one."

"I do," he said softly, reaching out and gently squeezing her shoulder. She smiled up at him, and he released her shoulder.

A sudden commotion made them whirl around, and they looked into the room just as Wallace shoved the table with all her might, pinning Carolyn against the wall.

"Shit!" Mike yelped as he darted into the room, with Alex right behind him. While he went to his wounded partner, Alex grabbed Wallace's arms and threw the bigger woman against the wall and pinned her roughly to it, shoving the handcuffs onto her wrists.

With a grunt, Mike grabbed the table and threw it away from his partner, then knelt down beside her and ran his hands over her face. "Car? Come on, Carolyn, talk to me," he pleaded, sighing shakily as she opened her eyes and groaned. Ignoring her feeble protests, Mike swept his partner up in his arms and started towards the door, pausing to look at Alex before he stepped out. "You got her?" he growled, and Alex nodded and gripped Wallace's arm in a painful vice grip. He glared daggers at Wallace, then carried Carolyn out of the room. Once they were gone, Alex yanked Wallace by the arm and shoved her down into the chair, ignoring her yelp of pain.

Without a word, Alex grabbed Wallace's right arm and rolled the sleeve of her shirt up, exposing a long surgical incision. She barked out a laugh when she remembered an SVU case a few years ago, and she realized what it was for. She delivered one blow to Wallace's stomach, smiling in self satisfaction when the other woman gasped in pain.

"This is police brutality!" she hissed, and Alex laughed again, rubbing her knuckles.

"Oh, I could show you police brutality, but I won't. You see, as soon as my boss comes in, you're going to be charged with aggravated assault, attempted kidnapping, and murder," Alex growled, her hands itching to deliver a blow to Wallace's pretty face. Wallace paled, and Alex laughed again.

Deakins walked into the room, and Alex stood up and strolled over to her boss. "Look at her arm," she stated. "And you'll see." Then she walked out, and Deakins followed her instructions, gasping as he made the connection.

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A roar of cheering and applause flooded the squad room as the social worker laid Bobby in Alex's arms. Alex hugged her son to her, and he squealed and threw his chubby arms around her neck. "Ma ma ma," he cooed, and she laughed and spun around in circles, her son cradled safely in her arms once more.

Coming to a stop, she realized that the entire squad was beaming at her and her son, and tears welled up in her eyes. "I want to thank everyone for helping me through this past year," she choked out, and Deakins quickly pulled her into a fatherly embrace, careful of the small child between them. She returned the hug eagerly.

When he pulled away, he saw the tears pouring down her cheeks, and he gently wiped them away, then kissed Bobby's forehead.

Carver appeared in her line of sight, and he waited patiently until Deakins and Alex looked at him expectantly. "I just wanted to let you two know that I'm charging Wallace with attempted kidnapping, first degree murder, and stalking in the first. We're seeking the death penalty. There's no way she's getting out of this," he stated confidently, and Alex's shoulders sagged with relief.

"Thank you," was all she could bring herself to whisper, and much to her surprise, Carver stepped forward and embraced her tightly. She relaxed in his hug, and the tears began to fall again. But this time, they weren't tears of heartache or misery. They were tears of relief and joy, and a sense of belonging.

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That night, Alex pulled her son's crib into her room, then gently laid him in it. Tucking the soft blue blanket around his body, she stood over his crib and gently rubbed his back. "I'm so glad you're back home, baby boy," she murmured as the tears slid down her cheeks. "I love you so much." Wiping the tears from her cheeks, she slowly left the crib and climbed into her bed, sinking down into the warm blankets.

_The slam of her bedroom door made Alex bolt upright, and she gasped at the sight of the figure leaning over her son's crib. Moonlight spilled into the room through her window, but the figure was hidden by shadows. She grabbed her gun from under the mattress and shot blindly at the assailant. But the assailant just laughed an eerily familiar laugh as she reached into the crib and snatched Bobby out of his bed._ "No!" _Alex howled, but Nicole just raised her gun, and with a broad smile, pulled the trigger._

"No!" Alex screamed as she bolted upright in her bed, and she quickly scrambled out of the bed and stumbled to her son's crib. Without a second thought, she reached her hands into the crib and picked Bobby up, and he let out a sleepy scream. She relished the sound as she laid her son on her shoulder and rubbed his back, rocking back on the balls of her feet.

"I'm sorry I woke you up, baby," she soothed, attempting to ignore the rain as it pounded ruthlessly against her window. His sobs reduced to snuffles, and she climbed back into her bed and laid him down beside her, curling her body protectively around him just as Bobby had done with her.

He returned to sleep almost immediately, but Alex had no such luck. Instead she laid there and watched him sleep until her alarm clock went off, and she wearily climbed out of the bed.

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Everyone smiled at her as Alex wheeled the stroller into the bullpen and guided it into Deakin's office. As soon as she walked in, Deakins stood up, a wide grin on his face. Alex watched as he crouched down in front of Bobby and started cooing at him, making silly faces at the laughing baby.

"Are you sure this is okay, Cap?" Alex asked uncertainly, and Deakins glared at her.

"Of course it is, Alex. This is my grandson, and you'll be right out there. I think we'll manage," he teased, lifting the baby out of his stroller and laying him on his shoulder. Alex laughed and shook her head, then handed him the blue diaper bag, kissed Bobby's cheek, and walked out of the office and to her desk.

As she collapsed into her chair, Mike and Carolyn walked into the bullpen, large smiles on both of their faces. Alex waited until they approached her desk before standing up and asking, "So, what did the doctor say?"

Mike's arm automatically went around Carolyn's waist, and she rolled her eyes and said, "The baby's fine. I'm a little worse for the wear, but to hear him talk, you'd think that every bone in my little bitty body had been broken."

Alex snickered, and Mike frowned and looked down at his partner, saying, "Well, excuse me for caring! She could have killed you!"

Carolyn shook her head and looked pleadingly at Alex, who threw her hands up in the air and said, "Hey, can't help you there. I couldn't say that I wouldn't do the same if it were me." Carolyn huffed and pulled away from Mike's embrace, stalking over to her desk and falling into her chair.

Mike smiled at her, then looked at Alex again and said, "Spitfire, isn't she?" A second later, he yelped and grabbed his shoulder, and Alex smiled before walking away.

"Serves you right, Logan," Alex stated as she sat down at her desk, and Mike rolled his eyes, then went to his own desk. Throughout the day, Alex would lift her head to look into the captain's office, even though she knew that her son was perfectly safe. But something had settled in her stomach, and it began to eat at her, refusing to leave her alone.

TBC...

A/N: Okay, so I'm a big softie... There's still a lot more to come, and I'm very unpredictable... MWAHAHA! (clears throat) Anways... Don't forget to review, my bunnies, duckies and other furry woodland creatures! Go, my darlings! Go!


	5. I Wonder

(gasps) I know, it's been forever since I updated this! But I finally got an ispiration, and this chapter came pretty fast. Enjoy, and please remember to review, bunnies! Oh, and I don't own the song I Wonder, by Chris Isaak... Darn.

Someone asked me why the inscision on Wallace's arm in the last chapter was important.. hmm... Okay, if ya'll watch SVU, there is an episode during the fifth season where a man, to escape a paternity test, cuts his arm open and inserts a tube of someone else's blood, then sews it back up. That's basically what Wallace did in the last chapter, and how she looked like she was Bobby Jr.'s mother. She's not. Don't worry. Just wanted to clear that up. Now, on with the story!

Disclaimer: They're coming to take me away, ha ha! They're coming to take me away, ho ho, hee hee, ha ha, to the happy home with trees and flowers and chirping birds and basket weavers who sit and smile and twiddle their thumbs and toes and they're coming to take me away, ha ha!

Oh, you're reading this? Well, in that case, none of this stuff that you recognize is mine... and that makes me sad...

This chapter is for **Infinity Star, Blu Cougar, **and **Confused**, cause they are awesome to me!

Owen Rogers frowned at his reflection, running one hand through his graying hair. He had a few more lines and wrinkles than he remembered, and he was a lot thicker than he used to be. He ran his hand through his hair again and looked down at the address for the nursery he was supposed to begin working at today.

Tucking the slip of paper into the pocket of his jeans, he glanced at the picture taped to the corner of the mirror, and he sighed and rubbed the back of his neck. "I'm sorry," he murmured, gently touching the picture with his fingertips. The person in the picture didn't move, and Owen ripped his gaze away and headed out the door before the heartache could return again.

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Alex gasped and tried to calm her racing heart as she shoved clothes into her suitcase with trembling hands. In his playpen in the corner of the room, Bobby babbled and laughed happily, and Alex grabbed him and filled his diaper bag with clothes and bottles for him.

She stifled a scream when she heard the man open fire, and she quickly grabbed the suitcase and ran out the backdoor, out to her car. As fast as she could, she strapped her son into his carseat, then jumped into the driver's seat and stomped down on the gas pedal. The tires squealed as she sped out of the parking lot and onto the highway, with her assailant directly behind her.

"Oh God, oh God," she gasped as she began taking short cuts and back roads to escape the black van that was right on top of her. He fired the gun at her, and a bullet grazed the side of her head, causing her to lose control of the car. The car skidded off of the road and hit the water, and the driver of the second car watched with sadistic glee as the SUV disappeared beneath the water's surface. Once he was satisfied that it was gone, he climbed back into his van and drove away with a smirk on his lips.

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Owen slammed his front door as he headed out to the ocean front. His mind was racing, and the soothing crashing of the waves against the shore always helped to calm his frazzled nerves.

He jammed his fists into the pockets of his jeans, the warm and salty air assaulting his senses as he carefully climbed down the rocks, landing on the soft sand.

The sand squished beneath his feet as he took slow, lazy strides, and as the wind whipped around him, he began to sing softly.

_When I was younger, I believed _

_That dreams came true _

_Now I wonder _

_Cause I've seen much more dark skies than blue_

_I keep on praying for a blue sky _

_I keep on searching through the rain _

_I keep on thinking of the good times _

_Will they ever come again?_

_Oh I wonder_

_How I wonder_

He kicked at a stone in front of him as he walked, his mind still whirring and out of control.

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As the SUV hit the water, Alex flung herself into the back seat and frantically tore at the restraints on her son's carseat. The vehicle was rapidly sinking, and she finally managed to free her son of the carseat and lift him into her arms. She looked through the window, and terror coursed through her veins as she yanked on the door handle. Finally she managed to shove the door open, and before she could react, water surged into the vehicle.

Pressing Bobby tightly to her body, Alex frantically kicked toward the surface of the water, until she finally broke the water's surface, and she gasped and examined her son to make sure that he had not been injured. Once she was certain he was fine, she looked around at their surroundings, then slowly began to kick her way to shore.

Finally her feet hit the bottom of the ocean bed, and she continued to struggle until the water was level with her chest, then her waist, and finally her ankles. Once she was completely out of the water, exhaustion overwhelmed her, and she fell to her knees with her son in her arms.

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Owen saw the person climb out of the water, and he sighed, figuring it was a bum or a surfer. But as he drew closer, he realized that it was a woman, and he broke into a run to make sure that she was alright.

Dropping to his knees, he saw a small child in the woman's arms, and he carefully extracted the infant and rested his hand on the woman's back. "Are you okay, ma'am?" he asked softly, and the woman gasped for breath before raising her head to look at him.

Their eyes met, and the woman gasped loudly. "Bobby?" she whispered, and he felt his own heart skip a beat as her eyes closed and she lost consciousness. He couldn't believe his own eyes. Alex, his Alex, was right in front of him, and that meant… He looked at the child in his arms, and a lump rose in his throat. The little boy smiled a toothless smile, and he looked around. Something terrible must have happened to her, but right now, he didn't care. He lifted Alex into his arms, then adjusted them both before rising to his feet and carrying them to his small home.

He fought with the door for a moment before it opened, and he gently sat his son on the floor, then carried Alex into his bedroom and laid her on his big bed. After tucking the blankets in around her and watching her for a few minutes to make sure that she was really there, he kissed her forehead, then walked back into the living room and picked up his son.

"Hey there, little man," he murmured softly, looking down into the eyes that mirrored his own. The little boy tilted his head to the side as he examined his father for the first time, and Owen let out a laugh. He shivered, and Owen quickly dried him off, then laid down on the couch with his son on his chest, both of them quickly falling asleep.

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When Bobby opened his eyes, he was surprised to feel a weight on his chest. But as his memories returned, he smiled and looked at his son, who was watching him with wide eyes. "Ma ma?" the little boy cooed questioningly, and he bolted upright as he remembered that Alex was unconscious in his bed. He climbed off of the couch and carried his son into his bedroom, where Alex still laid under the covers, and the little boy immediately began to squirm.

Bobby smiled and placed his son on the bed, where he clumsily crawled to Alex's side and gently began to push at her with his chubby hands. "Ma ma ma," he called, but she didn't stir. He continued to push at her, until she moaned and gathered him into her arms.

Bobby heard her sob, and he walked over to the other side of the bed and carefully sat on it beside her. He hesitated before reaching his hand out and laying it on her shaking shoulder.

Alex screamed and jumped out of the bed with impossible agility, and Bobby quickly stood up and said, "It's okay, Alex. Just calm down. You're both safe now."

She stared at him, clutching her son to her chest, and her eyes darkened. "Who the hell are you?" she demanded, and Bobby froze.  
"It's me, Alex. It's Bobby," he stated softly, and she shook her head furiously.

"No, no, you're not. You can't be. Bobby died. I lost him," she whispered, and he took a step closer to her, racking his brain for a way to prove to her that he was indeed himself. Taking another step, he unconsciously rubbed the back of his neck, then he said, "Alex, it's me. Please, you have to believe me."

She shook her head again and lowered her eyes to the ground, holding her son even tighter to her chest. When she looked up again, he was standing in front of his dresser and digging through one of the drawers. With a small cry of triumph, he retrieved the item he was looking for, then turned around to face her again. He held a small box out to her, and she looked at him before accepting it.

She adjusted her son on her hip, then reluctantly opened the box. "Oh my God," she breathed as she pulled the cracked Santa mug out of the box and held it in her hand. She looked up at him through tear-filled eyes, and he smiled crookedly at her. "Bobby?"

He nodded, and she extended her free arm out to him, pleading silently for him to hold her. In two steps he was in front of her, and she let out a shaky breath as he gathered her up in her arms and held her tightly to his chest.

His strong arms went around her, and her tears fell as she buried her face in his shoulder and ran her free hand through his hair. "Oh my God," she whispered, and she felt him chuckle and bury his face in her hair, kissing the top of her head.

"Ma ma!" their son shouted impatiently, breaking the moment. Alex laughed a little and reluctantly pulled away from her partner, turning her head to look at the small child in her arms. Bobby kissed her forehead, and Alex said softly, "You've missed a lot with him."

"I know I have," he sighed, looking at his son.

She shifted him on her hip, then sat down on the bed. "It's been really hard," she murmured, and he sat down beside her and snaked his arm around her waist.

"I'm sorry."

She turned to look at him, her eyes full of hope and pain. "What were you thinking, Bobby? Picking me to take care of your son?"

He didn't answer.

"I was so scared when your lawyer showed up and informed me that you had a son, and that you wanted me to take care of him. But when I held him for the first time…" Her voice trailed off, and she rested her head on his shoulder and sat their son in his lap.

He finally found his voice as he watched their son climb off of his lap and fall unharmed onto the carpeted floor. "I knew that he would be safe with you, and that you would love him." His voice dropped down to a whisper. "As much as you loved me."

The tears fell down her cheeks, and she said, "I do love him. God Bobby, after I lost you, I wanted to die. I just couldn't keep going. It hurt too much. But then I got your son, and the pain was a little more bearable. I love him so much."

He scooted a little closer to her and wrapped her up in his arms, pulling her into his lap and cradling her against his chest. "I'm so sorry about all of this," he whispered against her hair, and she shuddered and wrapped her arms around him as tightly as she could. "I didn't want to go, but they told me that if I didn't, you and my son would have been killed. And I wasn't going to lose either of you."

"So you thought it would be better to make everyone, make me think that you were dead?" she shouted, and he was surprised when her small fist collided with his broad chest. She sobbed and struggled to get out of his arms, but he held her firmly and rocked her back and forth, softly kissing her hair. Finally she went limp against him, and sobs shook her body as she clung to him like a small child.

"I'm sorry, Alex," he murmured over and over again. "I'm so sorry. I'll never leave you like that again. Never."

Her tears subsided a while later, and he gently laid her against the pillows and tucked the blankets around her shivering frame. He bent down to kiss her forehead, but before he could leave, she grabbed his hand and pulled him back down so that they were nose to nose. "Don't go," she pleaded softly, and he looked into her hazel eyes that were filled with love and fear. She didn't want him to leave her, and he didn't blame her in the least. For a whole year, she had believed that he was dead, and for a whole year, he hadn't been able to see or touch her and their son. So he was fine with not leaving her.

He pulled away from her and picked up their son, then climbed under the blankets beside her, tucking the small child in between both of them. She turned over and reached out for Bobby, and he scooted as close to her as he could without smothering their son. He kissed his forehead, then kissed her lips and tucked a small strand of hair behind her ear.

"Good night, Alex," he murmured, and she continued to watch him as she said, "Good night, Bobby. I love you."

"Love you too," he smiled, and she gently grabbed his arm and pulled at it until she had tucked it beneath her head. She watched him for a few more minutes, then her hazel eyes slid shut, and she drifted off to sleep.

Bobby watched Alex and their son for a while longer, still in shock and amazement that they were actually there, for him to hold and love.

To his surprise, his son rolled over and snuggled up to him, and Bobby smiled and laid one big hand on his back, caressing it gently. He had missed so much of both of their lives, time that he would never get back. But he would find a way to make it up to them, somehow.

As he watched Alex sleep peacefully, he wondered about how her and their son had done in the past year. He wondered about his first birthday, his first Christmas, and all the rest of their first. He wondered how many nights Alex had stayed up with him when he was fussy or sick, or how many times she had laughed when he had done something silly.

But most of all, he wondered if she would allow him back into their lives, and into her heart. He knew that it was a stupid thought, but a small voice in his mind kept insisting that she would run with his son, and that he would never see either of them again.

He shuddered and pushed the thought out of his mind, focusing instead on the fact that they were both there with him, safe and protected. He would never miss another moment in their lives, and he would take care of them and protect them until the last breath left his body.

Alex whimpered in her sleep, and Bobby reached over and caressed her cheek soothingly, murmuring, "It's okay, Alex. Nothing can hurt you now. I won't let it."

She sighed and relaxed, but he kept his hand on her cheek, his thumb moving slowly over her jaw.

"I won't let it," he repeated over and over. "I'm never letting either of you go again. Never."

TBC...

A/N: Okay, now that ya'll are all happy and stuff, leave a nice lil review for me, huh, darlins? Please??


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